Week 11 Resultas

Once again, all the good teams are bad and all the bad teams are good.

Fun fact: Every team that plays on Thanksgiving this year lost on Sunday this week. Crazy, I know.

I’m gonna be honest, I must’ve blacked out because I hardly remember anything from Sunday’s games. I didn’t even play that many video games while the games were on and I know I sat and watched Redzone all day, I just can’t really recall a lot that happened. I’m dying I think.

a dawg

Colts > Bills (41-15):
The Bills have a big problem that they need to fix ASAP. I don’t know what has happened with them but they are falling apart QUICK. Meanwhile, the Colts are making a legitimate case for their playoff dreams. Jonathan Taylor is fucking awesome, that is all that needs to be said about him. 5 touchdowns. The Bills aren’t gonna be retaking the AFC East either, especially with how atrocious their defense has been, not to gloss over how bad their passing and rushing game has been too. The panic button should not only be out but being hammered NOW.

Packers < Vikings (31-34):
The Vikings were right on the edge of losing this game and almost literally handed the win to Green Bay with the late-almost interception. I can’t deny it but the Vikings do look good right now, I still hate them and Kirk Cousins for no good reason. I need them to start losing in the next few weeks for the sake of the Eagles playoff hopes. In all seriousness though, the Vikings have a top 5 receiver and running back in the league. Justin Jefferson consistently drops 160+ yards it seems like and Dalvin Cook has been cookin’ too. For the Packers, they just couldn’t gather any real momentum, their defense was lowkey exposed and Mason Crosby is in his yearly mid-season slump. Overall, I think the result of this game affects the Vikings season more than the Packers who will still win the NFC North and be fine coming up. The Vikings are pretty much a shoe-in for the playoffs now though with an incredibly easy last 6 games.

Saints < Eagles (29-40):
Never in doubt, the Eagles came out and asserted their dominance on Sunday, put the rest of the league on notice that they have something this season. They’re a team no one wants to play right now. Jalen Hurts, Devonta Smith, Miles Sanders. Three STUDS. You could even add Darius Slay as a fourth, his last two games have brought him back to the Slay we all remember. Sirianni seems to have figured it out with their run game, Jalen Hurts is now a playmaker, 3 rushing touchdowns and 1 shattered pair of ankles. In the Saints locker room, Siemien is not the guy, they need someone else if they want to keep their hopes alive for the playoffs. Kamara wouldn’t have even made a difference today because Mark Ingram wasn’t even playing bad. I’m still so high off this performance, Bang Bang.

49ers > Jaguars (30-10):
Niners were riding high after kicking the shit out of the Rams last week and props to them for proving that it wasn’t a one time thing and carrying that momentum to this game. They started out the game with a THIRTEEN minute drive that somehow still ended up with just a field goal but I don’t care who you are or when it happened, a thirteen minute drive is always impressive. I can’t remember anything from this game other than seeing one highlight of Deebo running in a touchdown and my friend telling me that Brandon Aiyuk balled out. Kyle Shanahan has now likely saved his job for the remainder of the regular season at minimum, AND the 49ers with some good wins are now a team that might not make the playoffs but could still ruin someone else’s and prevent another team from making it. And to say anything about Jacksonville, can they just not play the rest of the year, no one wants to see Urban Meyer or Trevor Lawrence (bust). I can’t even imagine T-Law’s mental health right now, it has to be so much harder than usual to come in to the NFL and suck after literally never losing a regular game through all of high school and all of college. Sucks to suck though, next.

WFT > Panthers (27-21):
I remember almost nothing from the Football Team spoiling Cam’s return to Carolina. The main thing I recall is him running to the logo at midfield after scoring and slamming down the football to do his Superman celly. Looking up the stats here, Heinicke had a pretty good game with 3 tuddys, Scary Terry had 100+ and one TD and Antoine Gibson did his thing in the backfield racking up 95 yards on 19 carries. Are the WFT good? They’ve won 2 straight now both without arguably their two best defensive weapons. Honestly, I still think they suck and want them to lose cuz Bird MF Gang. I don’t care if they have an easy schedule too, Eagles are better.

wtf is this.

Ravens > Bears (16-13):
With Lamar out I knew the Bears had a chance and I wanted to see the Bears -no, I wanted to see Justin Fields- do well and maybe even win a game with a winning record. Unfortunately, he got his shit rocked. His ribs got bruised and Andy Dalton ended up playing almost well enough, you definitely can’t say this was his fault they lost. Darnell Mooney had himself a day too, with 121 yards and a TD. Tyler Huntley, who was electric in his post-game interview, had a great pass to Sammy Watkins that led to a game winning Justin Tucker field goal. Matt Nagy is lucky to still have a job, he honestly blew this game, it isn’t all on the defense, he just cannot coach in the NFL, he sucks so much. I hate looking at his face on a weekly basis, his best part of the game was when his headset broke, that was the Bears high of the game. Their failures as an organization is literally 100% his fault. Watching Andy Dalton vs. Tim Boyle on Thanksgiving is going to cause many forced conversations between family members you only see once a year because no one is going to want to sit through that.

Lions < Browns (10-13):
Tim Boyle made Lions fans miss Jared Goff. The craziest thing I heard when learning about him is that once he transferred from UConn to Eastern Kentucky, he had a negative TD-Interception ratio. That’s impressive that he was able to make it to a starting spot in the league. There is no way there are no free agents that the Lions couldn’t have signed for this one game that would not have been a better option. Regardless, the Browns played shitty enough to let Detroit have a choice. Baker is definitely not 100%, far from it and you can tell by his wife immediately coming to his defense on IG, just about the coolest thing you can do as an NFL wife that deserves no criticism whatsoever. #warrior

Texans > Titans (22-13):
Shocker of the week. Not sure what happened to the Titans this week. The ML was +200 before halftime and it was only like 13 point deficit to Houston. A bet anyone who has watched either of these teams at any point this season would confidently make. I am one of those dumbasses who lost money on the Titans this weekend. I don’t think anyone foresaw the Titans beating every good team in the league and also losing to both the Jets and the Texans. AJ Brown hurt his arm at one point and Westbrook was their leading receiver who still broke 100 yards which is hard to believe based off Redzone only putting this game on to show Ryan Tannehill throwing a pick that led to a Texans score. Tyrod Taylor had an awesome touchdown which while watching live, I fully expected the defense to catch him and pile drive his head straight back down but it somehow worked and he didn’t get hurt out of it. This game pissed me off honestly, I know they can afford to lose it but what the fuck Titans, you should have won this game by 40, don’t let the Texans think they aren’t the worst team in the league.

Dolphins > Jets (24-17):
This is the game no one wanted to even happen, I didn’t even see them show the stands so I cannot confirm or deny if any fans were actually there and am assuming there were none. I know Zac Wilson made it another week without throwing a pick, props to him. Joe Flacco, now looking up the stats, had 291 yards and 2 touchdown passes. That’s actually pretty impressive, good for him. I don’t have anything else to say about this, I seriously could not care less about how this game turned out. The Dolphins have won 3 in a row what the fuck even is this league.

Cardinals > Seahawks (23-13):
I hate the Seahawks this season, they do nothing and suck right now, do not bet on them this season under any circumstances. Before they played this game they went like 18 straight possessions without a touchdown, wow. I don’t even think it is because Russ isn’t at 100%. Like he still has Tyler Lockett and DK Metcalf. You can’t claim to be “back” and then suck this bad. Like Seattle would probably perform better with Geno Smith. I don’t think it’s even his hand, like the decisions on Russell Wilson’s passes are bad, Pete Carroll is washed, they can’t run the ball and they can’t stop anyone – even Colt McCoy. Their top running back had 10 carries for 36 yards. For Arizona though, without Kyler, Colt McCoy is doing just enough and James Conner is actually playing like a good running back right now. Murray is set to return after their upcoming bye week to play the Bears the first Sunday in December. This was the best case scenario for the Cardinals heading into the bye week.

Bengals > Raiders (32-13):
Okay so the Raiders season might be done and have given the Chargers the honor of being the second best team in the AFC West again. The Bengals I think surprised everyone to show that they had this kind of firepower still in them this season. I thought Joe Burrow looked god awful the last few weeks and while not a huge game stats wise he had a high completion percentage and won the game. Joe Mixon was awesome – 123 yards, 2 touchdowns and absolutely smoking the Vegas defense. They fixed whatever they needed to off the bye and this is what they needed to do. Based off this week alone, the Bengals are better than the Browns who shit down their throat two weeks ago. For Vegas, Josh Jacobs was just not himself, only 9 carries for 37 yards. Darren Waller had his best game of the season so far from a yardage standpoint but still overall a bust of a season, expectations were too high.

Cowboys < Chiefs (9-19):
This game fucking pissed me off. This should’ve been a guaranteed over to hit, the Chiefs are supposed to be back and the Cowboys offense is supposed to produce. The only thing Dallas showed me is that Tony Pollard is fast as fuck. I can’t be mad at anyone except myself though, I have told myself never to bet on the Chiefs this season, even if it is just for point total I can’t be doing this to myself. Also, I hate that the Chiefs are pretty much back and are going to not only make the playoffs but might make a run. It feels like they should have more than just 4 losses but that’s just because they barely won some games and all their losses are either unexpected or surprisingly bad losses. Either way I fucking hate Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs and never want to see them do good. The worst part of this game is realizing Kansas City’s defense might be really good now? They made Dak look bad again, like he looked like he did against the Broncos. More of a statement for the Chiefs though because the Cowboys were very hurt by the end of this, I don’t think they can be expected to win this with Amari out and Ceedee getting hurt mid game. Jackson Mahomes didn’t go to this game either though basically confirming the Chiefs secret for the rest of the season for success.

ekeler is a bald dawg

Steelers < Chargers (41-37):
The Chargers needed this majorly. They are 6-4 and still within striking distance of the Chiefs and they have a fair enough schedule to possibly still sneak up and take it from them especially if they beat them when they matchup again later in December in LA. Anyways, in this crazy, stupid, upside-down world we live in the over hit quite easily in a game where the I don’t think many thought this would based off the stats. The Steelers never put up points like this, Big Ben was back though and we all know how good he is at putting up big numbers, it’s his MO, obviously. Justin Herbert was electric and while this game was high scoring and there were a lot of fun moments, if I’m being honest, I was never fully watching or caring about what happened. For whatever reason I was having more fun getting shit on playing Valorant than watching this game. Chargers held on to win though and need to start building momentum off of this and carry it for a few weeks to top the Chiefs and win the AFC West.

Giants < Bucs (30-10):
Tom Brady finally covered a spread in primetime for the first time in 12 games. There was just no way the Bucs lose this game after having consecutive bad weeks, Tom wasn’t going to let that happen and I’m sure he let his team know, even with the Antonio Brown drama that is about as unsurprising as Aaron Rodgers being unvaxed too. In this game though, I really don’t know how Daniel Jones can be so tall yet get so many passes swatted by defensive linemen. What’s the point of having that height if you’re going to throw it for them to hit it down so many times? In no way am I saying that the Giants have a better option or shouldn’t use him but I’m just confused on how that happened like 6 times this game.

Bottomline, I have no money left and am horrible and sports betting right now. It’s unlikely I’ll stop but I need to figure it the fuck out and pick some winners to get my confidence back.

Note: I will either be putting out a blog for next weeks games including Thanksgiving on Wednesday night or at the normal time on Sunday but with Thanksgiving day game recaps.

Bug and Trev if you’re seeing this, like the post, love you guys 😉

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