Week 18 esketit

As the regular season comes to a close, this long ass season has given us a lot to take in and look forward to. And evidently, not a whole lot really matters a ton this week. All the teams with high seeds face teams that have been eliminated or have lower seeds. Still must win games for some like the Rams, Cardinals, Colts, and Titans. But for the most part, aside from the Chargers-Raiders game, every team is pretty secure in their current standings.

I’m not going to go into too much detail on the games that don’t mean a lot, because they just don’t mean a lot. 🙂

WFT @ Giants +7
I don’t think this game means an ounce to any single player for either team. Unpredictable what can happen. Now, having said that, the Giants might be the worst team in the league come the regular season finale. I’ve been saying this weekly now but it is a shame that the Eagles gave them one of their wins. Disgusting. I don’t even want to see this game.

Bengals @ Browns -6
With both Burrow and Baker sitting out of this game, anything can happen. Joe Mixon isn’t playing either so the Bengals offense is pretty thin which I do think is smart for them to get 100% for playoffs. Clearly a win or a loss doesn’t matter to them and without each teams starting QB in, on paper the Browns are probably better simply because of their defense (aka Myles Garrett). 6 points does still seem like a lot so I wouldn’t be surprised if the Bengals still cover this if not win because obviously one person can’t do everything.

Steelers @ Ravens -3.5
With Lamar Jackson officially ruled out, I am a little confused as to why the Ravens are still 3.5 point favorites. I think the Steelers not only cover the spread but win out right. They have the slimmest of hopes and after an emotional exit from Pittsburg last week, they might say fvck it and try to go out on a streak if the impossible doesn’t happen. Really thinking about it now, I don’t know what Vegas sees in the Ravens to win this game. They have no one. Sure, Huntley is good but TJ Watt is literally right there on the edge of the NFL Sack record and god do I hope he gets it. DPOY without a sliver of doubt.

Packers @ Lions +3.5
No matter how this game and playoffs go, Aaron Rodgers is about to be crowned as MVP in back-to-back years. 3.5 points is so few and even Tim Boyle can’t do anything to cover that small spread. Amon-ra St. Brown would not surprise me if he scores but that might be all she wrote for Detroit’s final game. Davante Adams is in too, so there really is actually no chance in hell the Lions win this or cover. If the 1 seed Packers do not rest there starters and lose to the Detroit Lions in the last game of the regular season than 2022 is cursed.

Colts @ Jaguars +15.5
Colts need to win this game to secure a playoff spot which is shocking they haven’t yet but it is what it is. 15.5 is a lot of points though and the Jaguars might want to shock the world week 18. I almost chose this as my underdog team to cover but talked myself out of it just because the Colts very well might win by 30 and shut out Jacksonville. Jonathan Taylor for Offensive Player of the Year in my book. Sorry Cooper Kupp.

Bears @ Vikings -5
With Andy Dalton starting and Dalvin Cook playing in a game that is relatively meaningless for both teams, I don’t think anyone knows what to expect. Both coaches are likely to be unemployed by Monday night so do they decide to go balls to the wall and just show other teams why they can still coach in this league? Maybe. Probably not but you can’t rule it out completely. Nagy is just awful, they’ve been winning a few here and there because they’ve had a nice schedule lately but still far from satisfying. And Zimmer might not even want a job next year, just leave and live the the sugar daddy life he deserves. With nothing to lose, 5 points seems like a stretch in this divisional game so I think the Bears cover but can’t say who wins outright with much confidence.

Titans @ Texans +10.5
This is a must win for the Titans if they want to keep the 1 seed. I know they have it in them to beat the 4-12 Houston Texans but I do not have the upmost confidence it will be by much. They lost to them already in embarrassing fashion. However, I know Mike Vrabel is thinking that even though they no matter what have a home game next week if they don’t win – they need that bye week plus homefield advantage after that. With an additional week they can certainly get Derrick Henry back and be a force to be reckoned with throughout the post season and really be able to compete against anyone. AJ Brown hopefully stays healthy and if they get a lead early I think they should rest him the second half unless need be.

Saints @ Falcons +3.5
No idea what is going to happen here. Not touching this game. Gross, yuck, no way Jose. All I want is for Alvin Kamara to score and for Blake Bortles to get some play time. They signed him for a reason. Also, maybe Matt Ryan has a good game, he hasn’t hinted at retiring but if this is his final game in Atlanta I might be a little sad. Not talked about a lot but he isn’t a young gun and isn’t winning a lot anymore, could see his career coming to a close.

Seahawks @ Cardinals -5.5
The Cardinals need to win this game and the Seahawks put up 50 last week. I don’t see the Cardinals losing this game and I don’t see the Seahawks covering. I think they have shown who they are and are going to go out of this season with a bad loss to a team that might lose in round 1 depending on who they play to be completely honest. Arizona has looked rough down the stretch to say the least.

Jets @ Bills -16.5
16.5 is a lot of points and the Jets, while still dog shit, have actually been a fun team the last month or so. They had a real chance to win last week against Tampa Bay. Based off that info and the Bills who have not been super reliable since mid-season, I think the Jets surely cover that massive spread but no doubt on Bills ML.

Panthers @ Bucs -8.5
This game doesn’t mean much at all. Bucs should win this no matter what happens. They were slow last week against the Jets but the Panthers at this point have to be thought of as worse. They don’t have an offense right now and I don’t know if I can think of a single positive for their entire team.

Patriots @ Dolphins +6.5
I don’t know what it is but weird stuff always happens in New England and Miami games. Especially since it is the last week of the season anything is possible. I don’t really believe that though, I think the Patriots win this game inevitably even if it isn’t the cleanest of wins. They need to win and pray the Bills choke so they can steal the AFC East crown back. Plus that would be awesome for the future bet I made on them to win the AFC east which has pretty much gone to shit at this point now.

49ers @ Rams -4.5
Both teams “need” to win here. San Fran would love to spoil the Rams NFC West winner aspirations and bump the Cardinals up. The 49ers have won the last 5 straight games over LA so this game is very up in the air. According to ESPN, Jimmy G is still listed as Questionable which means it’ll probably be a game time decision. If he plays, I think they at least cover, maybe even win the game. If Trey Lance is in, who knows, it could still happen but unlikely.

Chargers @ Raiders +3
The main event. Win and in. Also, it would be hilarious if the Colts lose and then both teams can get in with a tie. May or may not be rooting for that. Both defenses haven’t looked great this season so it should be a high scoring game which is always what you should root for, always fun. Anything can happen though, I personally do think the Chargers are the better team and that they have a better chance in the playoffs. The Raiders have sneaked back into contention though, won some big games and beaten good teams to get to where they are. With everyone playing for both teams this week, it is sure to be a shoot out and these games always come down to field goal. Chargers -3 is what I’ll be taking.

Sunday Funday:
Throughout the regular season I started writing these blogs for my own enjoyment and I really do love doing it so I obviously will continue to do so throughout the playoffs and whatnot. But to those few, if any who read these or even get to this part of the post, thank you so much. I do this for myself and anyone who will listen to me talk out of my ass. 🙂

Lock: Packers -3.5 @ Lions
I know the Lions always play well within their division and it’s always a game but with Aaron Rodgers + Davante Adams both playing it doesn’t matter.
Upset: Titans < Texans +10.5
I do still think the Titans win and secure homefield throughout the playoffs. However, 10.5 is a lot of points and the Texans did already beat the Titans who also have some questionable losses this year.
Over: Patriots @ Dolphins O40
Weird stuff happens in NE/MIA games, plus the Patriots are going to really want to win and we’ve seen them continuously put up high scores so why not this week too?
Under: Seahawks @ Cardinals U47.5
This game doesn’t matter a ton so 47.5 seems like a lot to ask for to me. I don’t see this being a super high scoring game like Seattle had last week.

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